How many of you seemingly resort to the same pastimes while you’re intoxicated? Time and time again, drinking leads to games such as beer pong, flip cup, card games and socializing with other party-goers. While these activities are certainly enjoyable, it seems as though new and creative drunken activities are hard to come by. In fact, it isn’t that hard to have a unique and fun time while you’re drinking, you just have to use your imagination. I’d suggest deciding on something prior to the slosh-fest, but it’s entirely up to you. Here’s a list of ten fun things you may want to try the next time you twist off the cap to your favourite alcoholic beverage.
1. Break Things
Breaking stuff can be a great outlet for aggression and child-like fun while you’re drunk. The more random and ridiculous the stuff you break, the more fun it usually is. Electronics are the number one favourite, they seem to be extra-enjoyable. If it’s possible, get your hands on a television that is a couple decades old, or likewise, a computer that hasn’t been used in ages. Once you’re good and hammered, haul off and bust them in whichever way you desire. Try dropping them from high places, or taking a baseball bat (or an object that is easily swung) to them. The first smash your bat makes through the screen is always satisfying. If televisions, computers or furniture aren’t easily accessible, try something smaller; throwing a high quantity of beer bottles down an empty alleyway can be blast while you’re loaded. Your friends will hate you (especially if you’re at their house, messing up their shit), but fuck it, you’ll be having a good time.
2. Sing And Dance
Who likes karaoke? No sober person likes karaoke. I’ll tell you who does; drunk people trying to have fun. Loud music and alcohol seem to go hand in hand and, for as long as brew has been consumed, has been followed by singing and dancing. A very appealing factor in karaoke bars is that you don’t have to be a good singer. You can in fact be considerably off-key so long as you put on a good performance. After you have consumed a borderline vomit-worthy amount of your favourite beverage, jump on stage and choose a song that everyone knows; dance around as though you’re really into it and you’ll have the whole bar singing in no time! If you are one of those house partiers, all you need is a stereo and a collection of your favourite CDs. Crank up the volume to the max and begin the onslaught of unruly behaviour. You’ll be extremely happy with the outcome, especially if you have “easy-going” females at the party, I guarantee it.
3. Yell At People (Especially Strangers)
A beloved (and sometimes regrettable) side-effect that accompanies the consumption of alcohol is considerably lowered inhibition. In other words, you don’t stop to think about what you’re about to do. This reason alone makes screaming at anyone a ton of fun. The best way to go about this is to have a sober friend drive you around. When the time comes and a passing stranger appears, roll down the window and yell at them. What you choose to say is strictly up to you, however insults about their mother or how “fat” they are tend to be the most fun while you’re drunk, although anything you’re able to slur will do. As with breaking things, the more ridiculous, the better. Incomplete sentences or sentence fragments (whether you know they are or not) are also good for a laugh. Try something like, “3 times 3 equals you, joeblow.” If you’re unable to find a sober friend to drive you around, yelling at people that pass by your favourite bar while you’re on the patio is a good alternative, however you have to be careful what you say unless you’re looking for a fight.
4. Ride Bumper Cars
Nowadays, the majority of amusement parks serve alcohol. In turn, the question of what to ride after you’ve drank a bunch of beer often gets raised. Roller coasters seem to be the most tempting, but the wavering thought of throwing up is always there. Anything that spins is definitely out of the question and same goes for a freefall ride. Bumper cars, on the other hand, are the perfect choice. They allow you and your buddies to recklessly smash into each other with tiny cars, all the while racing around a track at speeds that feel a lot faster than they actually are. The best part about this activity is you can take part without much danger at all to your personal well-being and safety. I wouldn’t suggest this activity with anything other than a large group of friends. You surely don’t want to be the only lunatic adult out there crashing into little children in a drunken mess.
5. Play Competitive Video Games
Video games can be an outstanding outlet for this alcohol-induced spirit. Gather a couple of your buddies together around a big bottle of something strong accompanied by an Xbox 360 or Playstation 3 and let the good times roll! Before you know it you’ll be shoving, cussing, bragging, cheering and screaming at your friends about “who’s the fucking man” and making sure they all recognize you as their “daddy.” The great thing about this is time will pass and you won’t even know it. Sooner or later someone will get up to use the bathroom and you’ll hear a faint, “It’s 2am already?” The best games for such a night are ones that pit all the players against each other. Try games like Mario kart, Call of Duty, Rainbow Six, Mario Smash Bros. or Street Fighter. All popular sports games are excellent choices as well. Prepare yourself for a lot of “pwnd” talk.
6. Go Swimming (The Less Clothing, The Better)
This is certainly one of the more dangerous drinking activities depending on the conditions of course. Drunk swimming is an incredible feeling because the weightless sensation water normally produces is amplified. The risk of drowning is also greater, so take a note from MADD and remember to never drink and d
rive. Try to have a “morally strong” sober friend around at all times in case you get into any trouble. The best possible condition to exercise this soothing activity is a personal heated pool. Who said stuck-up, rich friends are useless? Avoid ocean drunk swimming; it’s a lot more dangerous because of the greater depth, potential sea creatures, and random, unpredictable waves and currents. I don’t condone water games, especially at night, while you’re belligerent drunk because of the increased potential to become reckless, however it’s entirely up to you. A relaxing hot tub can do wonders for the senses after consuming a large quantity of adult beverages.
7. Get Thrown Out Of A Public Place
There are multitudes of ways to achieve this ultra-wicked feeling. Either by the crowd-pleasing route of excessive PDA with your significant other, problems with a group of people also in attendance, doing unlawful things, or just due to overall excessive rowdiness, never will you feel more righteous than when you and your buddies are tossed out of a public place drunk. Pointing with immense fury and yelling about how “this is horseshit” and “I don’t have to take this bullshit” while your friends drag you out can make you feel like someone to be reckoned with. Just don’t do anything to get yourself arrested. Being asked to leave a place for drunken conduct and creating a huge scene upon leaving will always provide some great laughs and cheap thrill for a night of debauchery.
8. Calling Friends
The common “drunk dial” is a perfect way to pass time while you’re chilling outside of your favourite bar or simply sitting at home after drinking an amount of alcohol that far exceeds your limit. You might be thinking, “who do I call?” The best bet and likely the most successful drunk dial would be another friend who is out having a wild night or would otherwise find it funny that you’re calling them tanked. You don’t have to worry about what to say; generally the hilarious conversation begins to flow the second they pick up. If, for some reason, they don’t pick up, you always have the option to leave a message. It is always hysterical when your close buddy lets you listen to an embarrassing and overall idiotic drunk message you’ve left them the next day. Refrain from calling straight-laced bosses, ex-lovers, or random phone numbers. It will definitely come back to haunt you once you remove the “beer-goggles.”
9. Jump In A Moon Bounce
One absolutely wild way to have a great time while you’re stupid-drunk is to rent one of these. You may be thinking that these things are for kids, but you would be surprised at how large they are being made nowadays. The moon bounce is far safer than a trampoline because of the cushioned walls, floors and ceilings, as well as the mesh netting to prevent your drunk, reckless self from falling out. While trampolines are fun, the risk of broken limbs and accidents of that sort are relatively a given. If things begin to get rowdy and people start throwing one another around, the moon bounce will protect anyone from serious injury. I recommend leaving any sharp objects out of the moon bounce. Jumping inside one of these can provide endless amounts of juvenile fun for dizzied adults.
10. Meet New People And Walk Away Mid-Conversation
You’ve always wanted to do it, why not with all the liquid courage? You’ve enviously watched your smooth friends do it, now it’s your turn. I suggest having a wingman of some sort to take a bit of the pressure off, though it isn’t necessary seeing as you’re ultimately going to walk away. Try to approach a group of no more than 3-5 new patrons. Graciously offer to buy them a drink and never do it. Raise a topic that is popular such as new movies, sports events or something you would see on E! News, especially if they are females. After a few minutes of conversation, preferably when one of them is telling a story, turn around and leave without returning. This will provide a ton of laughs for you and your blitzed buddies. Avoid confrontation with bigger individuals and remain polite throughout. It’s a harmless yet enjoyable activity to pass time. For more confident people, provide a new level of laughter by bringing up a truly ridiculous topic to begin the conversation.
Written by: Curtis Kinden